#unpublished is she right? Is there some sort of absolution in honesty?
Arriving at the InterConti in Berlin, a cold yet welcoming congress hotel, makes me feel alone. There are people in the lobby even at this late hour, the bar is still showing signs of life - other delegates, far more senior than myself, meeting their counterparts, talking confidently together. I am happy to be here, happy to be a part of a group that gets to learn about new topics, gets to meet new people (a meeting request has been sent already by someone from a country I have never even visited, no doubt to talk about topics I know next to nothing about). At the same time, after the weekend I got to have, I feel alone and unsure. What am I doing here? Not just in room 309, in this job… I don’t really care about water investing, I don’t really care about infrastructure. I would love to do more, to act faster. More, more more that’s what I seek, to grow and prosper, to prove to others and to myself that I am more than they thought, no matter how much they think of me. Is it youthful ignorance, or perhaps genuine drive? I must bide my time, learn what I can, from the people willing to teach me and from people I feel I ought to be taught by. The future comes more quickly than you realise, I am 25 now and I can feel time racing by, no doubt in 5 years I will look back and think about how naive all of this is. I can only hope that by then I am more than I am now, just another analyst at another fund having a hunger for a brighter future.
Arriving at the InterConti in Berlin, a cold yet welcoming congress hotel, makes me feel alone. There are people in the lobby even at this late hour, the bar is still showing signs of life - other delegates, far more senior than myself, meeting their counterparts, talking confidently together. I am happy to be here, happy to be a part of a group that gets to learn about new topics, gets to meet new people (a meeting request has been sent already by someone from a country I have never even visited, no doubt to talk about topics I know next to nothing about). At the same time, after the weekend I got to have, I feel alone and unsure. What am I doing here? Not just in room 309, in this job… Do I really care about water investing, do I really care about infrastructure finance? I would love to do more, to act faster.
More, more more that’s what I seek, to grow and prosper, to prove to others and to myself that I am more than they thought, no matter how much they think of me. Is it youthful ignorance, or perhaps genuine drive? I must bide my time, learn what I can, from the people willing to teach me and from people I feel I ought to be taught by. The future comes more quickly than you realise, I am 25 now and I can feel time racing by, no doubt in 5 years I will look back and think about how naive all of this is. I can only hope that by then I am more than I am now, just another analyst at another fund having a hunger for a brighter future.
Published on May 9, 2023